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d hits the ceiling — and there you stay。'
'But how do you e down again？' asked little Charlie。
'You do a burp； of course；' said Mr Wonka。 'You do a great big long rude burp； and up es the gas and down es you！ But don't drink it outdoors！ There's no knowing how high up you'll be carried if you do that。 I gave some to an old Oompa…Loompa once out in the back yard and he went up and up and disappeared out of sight！ It was very sad。 I never saw him again。'
'He should have burped；' Charlie said。
'Of course he should have burped；' said Mr Wonka。 'I stood there shouting； 〃Burp； you silly ass； burp； or you'll never e down again！〃 But he didn't or couldn't or wouldn't； I don't know which。 Maybe he was too polite。 He must be on the moon by now。'
On the next door； it said； SQUARE SWEETS THAT LOOK ROUND。
'Wait！' cried Mr Wonka； skidding suddenly to a halt。 'I am very proud of my square sweets that look round。 Let's take a peek。'
23
Square Sweets That Look Round
Everybody stopped and crowded to the door。 The top half of the door was made of glass。 Grandpa Joe lifted Charlie up so that he could get a better view； and looking in； Charlie saw a long table； and on the table there were rows and rows of small white square…shaped sweets。 The sweets looked very much like square sugar lumps — except that each of them had a funny little pink face painted on one side。 At the end of the table； a number of Oompa…Loompas were busily painting more faces on more sweets。
'There you are！' cried Mr Wonka。 'Square sweets that look round！'
'They don't look round to me；' said Mike Teavee。
'They look square；' said Veruca Salt。 'They look pletely square。'
'But they are square；' said Mr Wonka。 'I never said they weren't。'
'You said they were round！' said Veruca Salt。
'I never said anything of the sort；' said Mr Wonka。 'I said they looked round。'
'But they don't look round！' said Veruca Salt。' They look square！'
'They look round；' insisted Mr Wonka。
'They most certainly do not look round！' cried Veruca Salt。
'Veruca； darling；' said Mrs Salt； 'pay no attention to Mr Wonka！ He's lying to you！'
'My dear old fish；' said Mr Wonka； 'go and boil your head！'
'How dare you speak to me like that！' shouted Mrs Salt。
'Oh； do shut up；' said Mr Wonka。 'Now watch this！'
He took a key from his pocket； and unlocked the door； and flung it open 。 。 。 and suddenly 。 。 。 at the sound of the door opening； all the rows of little square sweets looked quickly round to see who was ing in。 The tiny faces actually turned towards the door and stared at Mr Wonka。
'There you are！' he cried triumphantly。 'They're looking round！ There's no argument about it！ They are square sweets that look round！'
'By golly； he's right！' said Grandpa Joe。
'e on！' said Mr Wonka； starting off down the corridor again。 'On we go！ We mustn't dawdle！'
BUTTERSCOTCH AND BUTTERGIN； it said on the next door they passed。
'Now that sounds a bit more interesting；' said Mr Salt； Veruca's father。
'Glorious stuff！' said Mr Wonka。 'The Oompa…Loompas all adore it。 It makes them tiddly。 Listen！ You can hear them in there now； whooping it up。'
Shrieks of laughter and snatches of singing could be heard ing through the closed door。
'They're drunk as lords；' said Mr Wonka。 'They're drinking butterscotch and soda。 They like that best of all。 Buttergin and tonic is also very popular。 Follow me； please！ We really mustn't keep stopping like this。' He turned left。 He turned right。 They came to a long flight of stairs。 Mr Wonka slid down the banisters。 The three children did the same。 Mrs Salt and Mrs Teavee； the only women now left in the party； were getting very out of breath。 Mrs Salt was a great fat creature with short legs； and she was blowing like a rhinoceros。 'This way！' cried Mr Wonka； turning left at the bottom of the stairs。
'Go slower！' panted Mrs Salt。
'Impossible；' said Mr Wonka。 'We should never get there in time if I did。'
'Get where？' asked Veruca Salt。
'Never you mind；' said Mr Wonka。 'You just wait and see。'
24
Veruca in the Nut Room
Mr Wonka rushed on down the corridor。 THE NUT ROOM； it said on the next door they came to。
'All right；' said Mr Wonka； 'stop here for a moment and catch your breath； and take a peek through the glass panel of this door。 But don't go in！ Whatever you do； don't go into THE NUT ROOM！ If you go in； you'll disturb the squirrels！'
Everyone crowded around the door。
'Oh look； Grandpa； look！' cried Charlie。
'Squirrels！' shouted Veruca Salt。
'Crikey！' said Mike Teavee。
It was an amazing sight。 One hundred squirrels were seated upon high stools around a large table。 On the table； there were mounds and mounds of walnuts； and the squirrels were all working away like mad； shelling the walnuts at a tremendous speed。
'These squirrels are specially trained for getting the nuts out of walnuts；' Mr Wonka explained。
'Why use squirrels？' Mike Teavee asked。 'Why not use Oompa…Loompas？'
'Because；' said Mr Wonka； 'Oompa…Loompas can't get walnuts out of walnut shells in one piece。 They always break them in two。 Nobody except squirrels can get walnuts whole out of walnut shells every time。 It is extremely difficult。 But in my factory； I insist upon only whole walnuts。 Therefore I have to have squirrels to do the job。 Aren't they wonderful； the way they get those nuts out！ And see how they first tap each walnut with their knuckles to be sure it's not a bad one！ If it's bad； it makes a hollow sound； and they don't bother to open it。 They just throw it down the rubbish chute。 There！ Look！ Watch that squirrel nearest to us！ I think he's got a bad one now！'
They watched the little squirrel as he tapped the walnut shell with his knuckles。 He cocked his head to one side； listening intently； then suddenly he threw the nut over his shoulder into a large hole in the floor。
'Hey； Mummy！' shouted Veruca Salt suddenly； 'I've decided I want a squirrel！ Get me one of those squirrels！'
'Don't be silly； sweetheart；' said Mrs Salt。 'These all belong to Mr Wonka。'
'I don't care about t